this is just going to be a quick post. I wasn't going to post today but I was just on the Curvy Kate Australia Facebook page having a look through past posts (not incessantly checking to see what progressions have been made in the competition I'm in...) and came across some posts made by disappointed women who weren't as lucky as I to have made it through to the top 20. I felt really sad for these women, and not in a condescending way either. In the way that I totally could relate to what they were feeling.
Now it's time for honesty. When I told my beautiful a close friend about the fact that I had gotten through to the final of this competition (Star in a Bra - Vote SERRA) after their initial congratulations, their mood became quite subdued. I was totally confused, taking this to mean that they were uncomfortable with my entering.
"We are never like this," I thought to myself, knowing my friend to be supportive and funny. I had to ask them about it, and after some poking and prodding they finally admitted what their fears were.
"I know you babe, and I know how passionate you get... and how disappointed you get. I don't want to see you get depressed if you don't get through..." they explained, reluctantly.
Now, these concerns are not unfounded. My friend is certainly right in saying that I am a very passionate person, someone who gets their heart set on something and can't stand the thought of having taken away. But the unfortunate facts are that there are some things we cannot control, the way this competition will eventuate for example.
To be perfectly honest with you, I had already assumed I had not gotten through. I was under the impression that the company was going to get in contact with the finalists well prior to the announcement and, since this had not happened, I was imply just having a squiz at who had gotten through when suddenly my own face jumped out at me from the bottom row. What a wonderful surprise!
Would I have been disappointed if my picture had not been there? OF COURSE! Will I be disappointed if my face is not amongst the top 5? ABSOLUTELY! Will it effect the respect I have for the company Curvy Kate, the other girls in the competition and, above all, myself? NO FREAKING WAY!
No matter what I am anxious for at that moment, whether it be a modelling competition or my latest marks in a university assignment, I should never and will never allow that to shape my self worth. I am a good person who is caring and thankful for the love and support I have around me.
I talk about the great people I have around me, and for all of these people I am full of love and gratitude, but my biggest advocate is myself. No one will love you or care for you better than yourself, and no matter what others may say, I will always pick myself up and brush myself off because I HAVE MY BACK!
So to all those people out there who may not have received what they expected, not just in this competition but in anything through their life, please remember to always love yourself, and whoever else loves you after that will feel that much sweeter :)
Peace and Love
Serra xxxxxxxxxooooooooo
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